Blue Bonanza!

Reading Response: "Am I Blue" by Bruce Coville

"Am I Blue" is a story about Vince, a child being bullied by Butch Carrigan, A student at his high school. Shortly after being pushed into a pile of mud on the sidewalk,Vince meets his Fairy Godfather Melvin. Melvin picks him off the street and brings him over to a nearby coffee shop. Melvin proves his magic abilities (turns his coffee to cocoa) and they start talking. Melvin is the first ever fairy godfather, on his first case. (Vince) Melvin really takes Vince's problems seriously because he himself was killed by 'gay bashing'.

Eventually he explains to Vince the third: "gay fantasy", that for one day all the gay people in the world would turn blue. This would show that gay people are everywhere, and prove that straight people do know gay people. Melvin gives Vince this vision (nicknamed Gaydar) while their sitting around in the coffee shop. About one third the coffee shop turns blue. Melvin and Vince discuss that Vince is only partially blue, because he is undecided. That night, Vince uses his second wish to have blue day. In the end it turns out that Butch Carrigan was blue, making his remarks at Vince just insecurity.

In the story, I am certain that Butch Carrigan's cruelty to Vince is based off his own insecurity, that he's gay himself. I pulled this from his only 'line' in the entire piece: "I'll 'teach you' to look at me!" He says: "I'll teach you to look at me!" You would teach someone something if it was done wrong. In fact, the guys in the alley that killed Melvin also say "I'll teach you!" I think this is the author trying to explain how some straight people assume that being gay is wrong. Now of course not all straight people think that way, but obviously (Butch) some people who are gay themselves think that being gay is wrong.

Another theme that caught my eye is the authors relationship between racism and 'gay bashing'. One of the best quotes proving this was:

"My friends and I called each other 'faggot' and 'queer' for the same reason so many black folks call each other 'nigger'--- to take the words away from the people that want to hurt us." - Melvin

I never really thought about using words this way, but it makes sense. The more you use a word, the faster it becomes the norm, so using words on each other, can break down what a word really means. I remember in fourth grade at a bullying assembly, the guy explained that words do hurt, so naturally my friend and I turn at each other and shout:
"Words! Words! Words! Words!"

But now it shows that words do hurt. You either ignore and move on, or get rid of the word itself. In all this fantastic(and occasionally banned) story tells us a lot about ourselves and who we think we are. Whether you're just not sure, or don't like who you are, you actually have to live with it. No matter how much you hurt other people it still doesn't change yourself.

Thanks For Reading! (It's Amazing you could get through that!(If you could)

-drat